I’m a bit incredulous that it’s already late February. Feels like just days ago that we wrapped up The Whole Shebang, that I was in Australia, that I made new friends… Already the new year has arrived (twice! Western & Lunar calendars) with new challenges… And I’ve already had time to succeed, mess up, and even pick myself up again.
I’ve been journaling a little more steadily again. Partly to prepare for ‘real’ writing. Partly also because when there’s so much going on, I tend to be full of sensations and sometimes have mixed feelings about everything. Teasing out problems with words, rendering ideas out on paper… I think normal people talk to their friends. I get to do that sometimes. But mostly everyone’s so busy. Plus I keep strange hours. Journaling is the healthiest thing I know how to do for myself.
Finding my centre. I used to say that about the time I took off when I was younger. “What was it like to live in Paris?” The Paris and Europe bits were great. But the real importance of that time abroad, alone, away – it was how I found my centre. When you know this is what “right” feels like for you, that awareness gives you a reference point. You can always check in with yourself and ask “is this feeling right?” If not, then at least you know you have to make some changes and you know what you’re aiming for…
I think most things, most times as I was growing up… very little of it felt Right.
So Paris was great. But as you grow and change, what’s Right also warrants change, modification, amending.
I suppose this year is a bit of that. With all that has happened and what lies ahead, I’m looking forward to locating my centre within this new context.
That said, today and tomorrow are studio days. (YAY!) Better get on it.